Food allergies suck. Hardcore.

Dealing with kids with food allergies is hard. Lots of people these days have to do it and let me tell you, it sucks balls. It isn't as hard when it's only one allergy, or even two. It still stinks and you end up having to plan around it, but at least if they're simple things to avoid, like kiwi or something, ok. You avoid kiwi and call it good.

But what happens when your kid is apparently allergic to half the living world? It's a major pain in the ass that takes over your whole existence. Well, that's what it feels like anyway. Our older two, A & the R, have confirmed allergies to some major foods, like chicken, pork, and bananas (bananas?!?! ), as well as some other annoying things like spices and nuts. Our youngest, M, is now showing reactions to foods too, but is not diagnosed yet. But our middle child has violent reactions to foods and has reactions to things that were not available on the scratch test.

Ever hear of annatto? It's the stuff used to color foods yellow and orange, like every yellow/orange cheese on the planet. It's also in most dairy products as a coloring for vanilla (why they don't leave these things pure white is beyond me...) as well as in lemon, pineapple, etc. flavored things. And food dyes. Ever tried finding prepackaged anything without food dyes? It's like finding a quarter in your couch. There's plenty of change in there, but the chances that the coins you dig up are actually quarters and not useless freaking pennies? Astronomical.

Just taking our kids out to eat is a major production. Never mind keeping them occupied while waiting for food. Or making sure they don't act like ravenous banshees attacking their food with their fingers as if we haven't fed them in weeks. That's child's play, pun very much intended. Ordering from the standard kids' menu in a restaurant? That's like disarming a nuclear weapon. With a hammer. Grilling our poor server about what spices they use on their burgers and what kind of white cheese they have is not my idea of fun.

Even cooking at home is no easy feat, so it isn't exactly an escape from the restaurant hell. First you have to buy food that's safe, which means agonizing hours reading ingredient lists in the store. And let me tell you, most of the foods that are safe include the word "organic" or something similarly overpriced, so our food budget is ridiculous. Then I have to cook the bloody food, making sure no one's allergens cross anyone else's cooking pot or plate. Then they can eat. It actually kinda makes going out to eat seem simple sometimes.

Anyone else out there battling the food allergy craptacular? Any thoughts on how to conserve my sanity? (What little may be left...)